Smokey Mountain Refuge

Smokey Mountain RefugeSmokey Mountain RefugeSmokey Mountain Refuge
Home
Services
Contact Us
SECURE BY DESIGN (Beta)
The Desert & The Well

Smokey Mountain Refuge

Smokey Mountain RefugeSmokey Mountain RefugeSmokey Mountain Refuge
Home
Services
Contact Us
SECURE BY DESIGN (Beta)
The Desert & The Well
More
  • Home
  • Services
  • Contact Us
  • SECURE BY DESIGN (Beta)
  • The Desert & The Well
  • Home
  • Services
  • Contact Us
  • SECURE BY DESIGN (Beta)
  • The Desert & The Well

Secure by Design (Beta Cohort)

A 12-Week Relational Formation Group

For individuals ready to stop overriding themselves in the name of connection.

Apply for the Beta Cohort

Current Status: Applications open for January 2026

The Invitation

Secure by Design is not about fixing your dating life or learning better strategies.


It is a relational formation process for people who notice themselves self-abandoning, rushing clarity, or overriding internal signals when connection feels uncertain.


We work beneath behavior—at the level of nervous system pacing, attachment awareness, and relational integrity—so connection no longer requires self-betrayal.


What We Work On

  • Attachment Awareness
    Auditing the survival alarms that drive urgency, chasing, or shutdown.
     
  • Nervous System Regulation
    Expanding your window of tolerance so consistency and peace no longer feel threatening.
     
  • Relational Integrity
    Learning to speak, choose, and set boundaries from clarity rather than fear of loss.

The 12-Week Journey

We move through three distinct phases of formation:

  • Phase 1: Awareness & Auditing (Weeks 1–4)
    Identifying attachment patterns, somatic triggers, and familiar relational loops.
     
  • Phase 2: Capacity & Containment (Weeks 5–8)
    Practicing self-regulation and learning to tolerate the slow build of secure connection.
     
  • Phase 3: Integration & Integrity (Weeks 9–12)
    Codifying your personal Relational Manifesto and practicing clear, boundaries advocacy for your needs.

Is This For You?

This is a fit if:

This is not a fit if:

This is not a fit if:

  • You notice anxious or avoidant patterns repeating
  • You experience urgency, over-functioning, or emotional exhaustion
  • You want to relate from clarity rather than fear
  • You are willing to practice self-regulation instead of seeking reassurance

This is not a fit if:

This is not a fit if:

This is not a fit if:

  • You are in an active mental health crisis
  • You are in an ongoing abusive relationship
  • You are looking for scripts, tactics, or matchmaking
  • You are seeking group therapy or crisis support

Frequently Asked Questions

Please reach us at carollocrawley@gmail.com if you cannot find an answer to your question.

Secure by Design is designed for individuals who are able to maintain a baseline level of emotional regulation and stability. This group is not a good fit for those currently experiencing frequent emotional crises, rapid relational shifts, or significant difficulty managing emotional intensity. A steadier internal foundation allows this work to be effective and respectful of the group container.


This group is not designed to support active conditions that require ongoing clinical containment. Individuals who benefit most from Secure by Design are able to observe themselves, tolerate discomfort without acting it out interpersonally, and take responsibility for their internal states within a group setting.


Secure by Design requires consistent attendance, personal reflection between sessions, and a willingness to engage honestly with the material. This is not a drop-in group or a passive listening experience. Participants are expected to show up prepared, present, and willing to do their own internal work over the full 12-week process.


No. This group is designed to strengthen internal regulation and self-leadership, not to provide emotional stabilization through others. Participants are expected to arrive with the capacity to self-soothe, reflect, and stay grounded without relying on the group for reassurance or emotional containment.


Secure by Design moves intentionally and requires patience, reflection, and follow-through. If you are feeling overwhelmed, ambivalent, or unsure about your ability to commit time and attention to this process, it may not be the right fit at this time. Choosing readiness is part of the work.


Applications are reviewed carefully to assess emotional stability, readiness for self-reflection, and fit for a relational formation container. Not all applicants will be accepted, and declining participation is not a judgment — it is a matter of group safety, integrity, and effectiveness.


We move slowly and intentionally. Each phase builds capacity before moving forward.

Apply for the Beta Cohort

Protecting the container protects everyone inside it.

Program Logistics

  • Dates: January 21 – April 8, 2026
  • Schedule: Wednesdays, 7:00–8:30 PM Eastern
  • Format: Live, online small group (Google Meet)
  • Group Size: Limited to 6–8 participants

The Investment

  • Total Program Cost: $960
  • Founding Member Incentive: $864 (pay in full)

Split-payment options are available and discussed upon acceptance.

All payments are non-refundable once the program begins to protect the integrity and continuity of the cohort.

The Application Process

Because this is a curated container, we follow a simple three-step process:

  1. Apply: Submit the brief application form
  2. Assess: If aligned, you’ll be invited to a 15-minute assessment call
  3. Enroll: If group chemistry is a fit, you’ll receive an invitation to join

Final Note

Secure connection is not built by trying harder.

It is built by slowing down, staying regulated, and choosing integrity over intensity.

If you are ready to stop auditioning and start relating from clarity,

you are invited to apply.

APPLY FOR THE BETA COHORT

Smokey Mountain Refuge

Copyright © 2026 Smokey Mountain Refuge - All Rights Reserved.

Powered by

This website uses cookies.

We use cookies to analyze website traffic and optimize your website experience. By accepting our use of cookies, your data will be aggregated with all other user data.

Accept